It's funny how normal days, those days where there's no discussion of transplants, kidney disease, fistulas, or dialysis, feel so good. Yesterday was one of those boring normal days, that I so badly want to return to.
It was my brother-in-law's 75th birthday celebration. Nothing fancy. Just all of us getting together to talk, laugh, and just be together. In the space of almost 3 1/2 hours, it was cool to just be a part of the laughter and the stories that had nothing to do with getting poked with needles or visiting with doctors for the latest pronouncement on my condition.
As I've mentioned before, I think these kind of days help my family get more comfortable with being around me. No one seemed worried that I was going to drop another request for a kidney in the middle of the celebration. That makes it easier for me too.
A thought that I keep coming back to in recent days is how different we are when it comes to dealing with doctors and our medical conditions. A friend of mine shared with me that he learned he has cancer, and although it looks like it was detected early and there are plenty of reasons to be optimistic, he shared with me how difficult it is for him to deal with the doctors.
What can you say about that? I'm certainly no expert on the subject, but I know that I want to live. If that means I have to ask questions over and over until things make sense to me, I'm going to do that. We have to be advocates for ourselves, and hope that comes across to the health care providers, so they understand that they can't bullshit their way through a visit.
Something else I see, especially in the dialysis clinic, are people that won't take care of themselves or take advantage of the resources available to them to help them navigate through something like kidney disease. It sucks to have to come to dialysis, but the payoff after each visit is another day of feeling better. Between dialysis and paying closer attention to what I put in my mouth, I'm feeling better today than I was feeling a year ago at this time. Certainly, I can't be the only one who picks up on the positive things that happens when we take care of ourselves.
This is what happens when I have idle time to think about stuff. I need some more hobbies! Maybe I just need some more normal days like I had yesterday. Those sure are nice.
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